Reaping what you sow

There used to be a boy named Isaac at our church, and his parents were good friends with my parents. One evening I heard my parents discussing Isaac, he had done, something especially bad, and so mom and dad were talking about if any of us ever did that, what our punishment would be. I don't even remember what he did, but it was something that no one was too thrilled with. On Sunday, all of us kids went downstairs for our Sunday school lesson. Our Sunday school teacher (who also happened to be my Aunt Ruthie) before we started, would always ask each of us for something we wanted her to pray about before class. This Sunday, I felt it was my place to declare to the entire Sunday school class, what Isaac had done, and ask Ruthie to pray that he would be a better boy. That sure made him mad! He declared that he wasn't a bad boy, but told him “Are too! My mommy said so!”. I just looked down my nose at him, and thought about what a good girl I was.

Okay, I'm pretty sure that all of us have been taught not to steal. But I'm also sure that at one point in all of our lives, we have taken something that wasn't ours! Maybe it was just a piece of candy from your brothers stash (guilty as charged!) or some other “small” (I say “small”, because all sin is sin in God's eyes) thing, but at some time, each one of us has done something of that sort. If you think about it, why else would our parents tell us not to do things, unless we had just done the exact thing they're telling us not to! I'm not sure about all of you, but when I would see my mom or dad admonishing one of my siblings for something they did, I would start to feel kinda self righteous. And thoughts like “I would never do that!”, would come to my mind.

When my sibling and I were younger, mom would never let us have gum. I'm sure those of you that know what a klutz I am, can understand why my mom wouldn't want me having any :-P. When Timothy and Benjamin got a little older, they were allowed to have gum, and boy oh boy were us younger four jealous when ever they had any! Though, I'm sure that their rubbing it in didn't help at all! The story I am about to tell you, happened only a few weeks after the incident with Isaac. It was a Thursday evening, after bible study, and we went food shopping at Winco. We were in the checkout line, and mom and dad were loading up all the stuff on to the sliding belt. Us kids were rather bored, and were trying to find something to amuse ourselves, and that's when Benjamin picked up a roll of Hubba Bubba Bubble Gum that was out of place, and sitting right there among the magazines. He looked longingly at it, but knew that he didn't have any money, and that mom would never buy it for him (think about it, she buys one, she has to buy us all one...and there are 6 of us...not gonna happen!). So he puts it back down in the same spot, and kinda meanders off to do something else. There it was...sitting there, just begging for me to pick it up! So I did. I smelled it, the sweet bubble gum flavoring wafted up to my nose and a horrible thought jumped into my mind, “What if I just took it?”. I of course dismissed the thought at first, I knew it would be wrong. But I didn't stop thinking about it, and I ended up being persuaded by these thoughts to take it. “No one is looking! You never get any, and it's not fair, you should be allowed to have it! The store wont really care, it's just a little thing of bubble gum out of the entire store! No one will ever know, so it wont worry anyone!”. Mom and dad started to load everything into the cart, this was my chance, no one was looking! I quickly slipped the pink bubble gum package into the pocket of my dress, and covered it with my hand so that no one would see the bulge. I immediately started to feel guilty, but I just countered the pokes of my conscience with the arguments that I had let persuade me to take the gum in the first place. When we got home, I was the first out of the van and ran into the house. I was going to hide the gum somewhere, but I didn't have enough time, the others were coming in the house with the groceries. So instead I just laid on my stomach in the middle of the living room. Everyone was filing through the front door helping out...except for me. Mom told me to get up and go and help. Thinking quickly I told her I didn't feel good, which was true technically. Somehow I managed to get upstairs without being detected. Now the trick was to find somewhere that I could chew my gum in peace...the only place would be the bathroom.

During the course of the next few days, I would sneak off to have gum in the bathroom. Curiously, I wasn't enjoying the gum as much as I thought I would. I still hid the gum in the pocket of my dress because since I shared a room with my sisters, I didn't want them to find it, and they were less likely to be going through my clothes then my others stuff. Sometime in the next week (don't remember what day, but it was early in the week) mom remembered that one of the buttons on the dress I had been wearing on Thursday had come loose, so she asked me to go and get it. I ran upstairs, and grabbed the dress, not thinking to take the gum out. So I ran down the stairs with the dress and just as I came bouncing into the dining room, the gum fell out of the pocket of my dress. There was a shocked silence for a few moments afterward, and then mom picked up the gum and looked at me. She wasn't too happy you might say. I kinda mumbled, and didn't know what to say, but sat there in shame with all my siblings staring at me. Benjamin kindly remarked, “I saw her pick it up, but I didn't think she'd actually take it!”. Mom told me we would go to Winco on Sunday, and buy it, and I would have to talk to the manager about what I did. Weren't all my siblings eager to tell daddy what I had done when he got home! I had a very uncomfortable rest of the week, thinking about what I would have to do on Sunday after church.

Sunday school was horrific...Benjamin decided to tell the entire class what I had done, and then I had Isaac triumphing over me, disappointed looks from Aunt Ruthie, and horrified looks from most of the other children. I couldn't wait to get out of Sunday school, but at the same time I was dreading it. I knew immediately after Sunday school was done, we would go to Winco so that I could confess to some stranger. The stranger part was especially bothering me. I was horribly shy, and I would have to tell astranger how bad I had been! I pretty much avoided everyone and went strait to the van when Sunday school was done. Eventually everyone was piled into the van, and we headed off. I shrank down in my seat, wishing that I had never taken the gum, and wondering why I had ever thought that it was such a good idea. By the time we got to the store, my palms were super sweaty, and I was already trying not to cry. I had to be practically pushed out of the van, and dragged into the store by mom. I remember I kept asking if I had to do it, and mom always very firmly said yes. I don't know how long we had to wait to talk to the manager, but the minutes felt like hours. When he finally came, I just stared at the floor, trying not to look up for as long as possible. I don't recall what mom said to him, but I remember him coming down to my level and looking me in the eye. He told me that it wasn't okay to steal, and that God didn't want us to. He said that this time I wouldn't get in trouble (by him) but that he hoped I wouldn't do anything like that in the future. He was very kind, and I certainly didn't appreciate it enough then. When he left, mom went and bought the gum, and on the way out the door, she threw it into the garbage, making sure I could see her do it.

Well, I certainly learned my lesson. I never stole from a store again. For years after that, I always hated going to Winco. If I could, I would stay in the van and not go in. I hated that it reminded me of how bad I had been. Every time I did end up having to go in, I would keep my head down and try not to be seen by anyone. I also remember that some times when we would go in, I would see the manager, I really tried to hide then! There was a really terrible time when he actually recognized me and mom and came and talked to us!

Proverbs 16:18

“18Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.”

James 4:12

“12There is one lawgiver, who is able to save and to destroy: who art thou that judgest another?”

I judged Isaac, and unabashedly! That sure came back to bite me. Isaac was happy to get the chance to get me back for what I did to him! To me it feels like a lot of the time when we see others struggling, instead of encouraging them, we point fingers, and feel self righteous.

“Wow, their struggling with that? They can't be very strong Christians to be going through something like this. There is no way I would ever struggle with something as simple as that!”.

Instead of lifting them up, we bring them down, and ridicule them. Sometimes we even go as far as to gossip about it! We tell others about their struggles, and beat them down in front of others! Not even close to Christ like behavior! Would Jesus ever do anything to discourage, and bring someone even lower then they already were? No. As Christians we are the example of Christ to this world, if we are gossiping about someone, beating them down, instead of encouraging them, what does that say to the world? Well one thing is sure, it doesn't glorify God! Why would someone want to become a Christian if they see us as just like them, gossiping, and beating each other down? They already have that in the world, so why come to Church so that they can wear a suit and do the same thing? We need to encourage, lift up, build up, be the helping hand, the ones to support each other. Not the ones who beat down, discourage, knock down the supports, and wont even touch each other with a ten foot pole! All we do with this discouraging behavior, is make the victim sad and mad. The only thing that they'll learn from it, is not to trust you.

Matthew 26:41

“41Watch and pray that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”

Luke 8:6 & 13

“6And some fell upon a rock; and as soon as it was sprung up, it withered away, because it lacked moisture.13They on the rock are they, which, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, which for a while believe, and in time of temptation fall away.”

When Timothy and Benjamin got to have gum, the other four of us were very jealous. I ended up taking it into my own hands to take before it was the right time for me to have it. I knew that it was wrong, and in the past I had thought that I would never do something like that. But “in time of temptation” I ended up doing exactly what I was sure I would never do. This ties in with my last email about contentedness. We see others having the benefits of being older (Marriage, dating, courting) and instead of waiting out turn, we try to take it before we're actually ready. And then we might try to hide it from our parents, which never works well, because they usually find out about it anyway. I was very tempted to take that gum, and I allowed myself to do it, and I regretted it later. When we take things before we're ready for them, we end up regretting it. We don't think anyone will mind “What they don't know wont hurt them” right? Thing is, they end up knowing, so it does hurt them. And when we're doing something behind someones back, we usually feel kinda guilty about it. I certainly did! Because I didn't wait for the proper time to have the gum, I didn't enjoy it as much, and I displeased many people including myself. But did I want to confess? Uh, no! Even though I knew it was wrong, and I wished I hadn't done it, I really didn't want to go to that store and tell them what I had done! It wasn't because I was enjoying the gum so much that I didn't want to give it up, it was because of pride. I didn't want someone I didn't even know, knowing how bad I had been! When we do something we know is wrong, and we aren't really having a good time after all, sometimes we still don't want to actually go to God and confess our sin, and ask him to forgive us. We have to be pushed, and pulled, by our conscience to actually go to God. It's not like God doesn't already know what we've done, but he wants us to come to him and tell him about it ourselves. The longer we wait, the harder it is.

“It was so long ago, why does it still matter? It's not like I'm going to do it again or something.”

Even so, just because it was a long time ago, doesn't mean that it's something that still doesn't need dealt with. I know it's so hard to bend our pride and actually go and admit that we were wrong, but that doesn't make it any less necessary. God wants to hear from us, he wants to help you overcome things, he is willing to forgive!

Romans 2:1 & 3

“1Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest does the same things.3And thinkest thou this, O man, that judgest them which do such things, and doest the same, that thou shalt escape the judgment of God?”

Galatians 5:14

“14For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.”

Galatians 6: 1-2

“1Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; consider thyself, lest thou also be tempted. 2Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

Galatians 6:7

“7Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.”

I definitely had that day in Sunday school coming to me. That verse from Galatians 6:7 really says it all eh? I judged Isaac, told the entire class about what he had done, and felt self righteous about it. I in turn, had my brother tell the entire class what I had done, had Isaac lording over me as I had lorded over him, and had many people judging me also. Be careful; what you sow, you will reap. If we knock each other down even farther, then when we're down, we'll be pushed down too. We teach others by our behavior. Have you ever noticed how little kids like to copy you? Kinda like that. When we judge, and put each other down, we teach others to do the same, especially newer Christians. They are like little children, who are going to copy what you do, so if they see you putting someone down, and judging, they will do the same. Another reason we do this is peer pressure. Who says it's “cool” to encourage each other? Who says it's “cool” to build each other up? Who says it's “cool” to extend a helping hand? Doesn't it just seem easier to sit back and judge? Yep, maybe it is easier, but that doesn't make it right. When one person does the easy thing, and judges, that just makes it easier for the rest of us to do the same. It's kinda odd how when it's something wrong, we find it so easy to follow, but when it's something good, we are reluctant. If we loved each other, as we love ourselves, then wouldn't encouraging each other be so much easier?! We ought to look on each other with love, not judgment. Think about how it would feel if you were in that position, and then someone came along and just made it all worse by gossiping, and pointing fingers at you. Yeah, wow, that would really stink huh? Love, as Christ has loved you!

John 13: 34-35

“34A new commandment I give unto you, That you love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. 35By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”

James 1:12-15

“12Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love him. 13Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man: 14But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. 15Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth froth death.”

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- Bekah